As a child I always use to look up to people who were good looking You know like people who use to be attractive but I had my lesson learnt in a hard way when I met this girl. Her name was leila one of the most attractive face I’ve ever seen, Her look could give a dying flower a life can turn water into wine. It wasn’t hard to notice that I was feeling something in my stomach. The butterfly kind of things I had heard was turning out to be true and it took a hell lot of guts for me to ask heaven out for a date. Stomach was suffering from butterflies blood was flowing at 100km/hour the feel was different my love was true. First few months were just like summer And nobody hates on summer flowers bloomed started learning each other, accepting flaws but soon the winter was on its way and she Evolved into something i never thought of, I had always accepted her dark side, her past, but something I wasn’t able to handle was her disloyalty and I turned cold, man with shattered heart and a smiling face and soon I realised people with the most pretty face can be the most cruel at heart. If I had it my way I’d have stabbed her with the same knife she left in my back but, for her I was a different person all together its like If she’d dig me a grave I’d sleep in it. The only fact that remains true but still unsaid is “I’m still angry”
I could’ve been what I wanted to be maybe a soul to a body, hand to a needy, but I guess it all have changed with time I myself Feel lost. I have friends I have people I can run up to but that’s not how I like to feel, I like feeling myself as I have no one to run up to I’ve trust issues I may know you from past 7 years but I’d think 100 times before I take a step with you. If struggle is way through ones life I feel I’m not loyal to my life. Been digging myself out of the grave every morning. I look happy but I have deepest part of me buried and it wakes up when world falls a sleep. I don’t know why I’m writing this random lines drawing paint in words describing myself or even it can be a suicide note before I start Opening gate for my after life. But was it all worth? The pain? Insane if this is all life offers me why was I born? Am I just a part of some fucked up cult?
Or here for a reason? Here to make this world realise the man who offers love is the loneliest of all. I know there are people even worst Condition than mine but I guess I’m just too weak to get back up this time. I can go on and on.. But for today I’m ending this here dropping my pen taking last sip of my whiskey wishing i don’t wake up tomorrow.